After Yet Another Workplace Accident, NASA Is Banning the Following Basketball Moves
Projections show that if the current situation is allowed to continue without intervention, the vibes at NASA could reach weird levels.
Tag: Sports
A Eulogy for Tom Brady (1977-2296)
When Tom first started playing, there were no 5th downs or 100-yard field goals. And every game took place on Earth, where gravity was a huge factor.
Broadcast of a Baseball Game Between Dads Checking on a Sound in the Middle of the Night with Baseball Bats and Louisville Slugger Factory Workers Who Test Bats for Quality Assurance
The dads effectively hit everything except the ball causing a lot of property damage while the factory workers could not settle on a bat.
16 Phrases to Avoid to Mask That You Don’t Understand Soccer
“Nobody ever scores.” Dozens of goals have been scored in Soccer, the last of which was in 2006.
How to Protect Your Stadiums from the Swarm of Sports Fans Emerging after 16 Months
Badly behaving sports fans (A.K.A. “Brood W”) have exploded in population due to their inability to behave in public after their long hibernation.
Simon Says for Games of the XXXII Olympiad
Simon says put your hands on your hips if you didn’t realize this year’s summer games were not actually called the 2021 Olympics.
Devin’s Ping-Pong Club Weekly Newsletter No. 23: Addressing Last Week’s Issues
If you are caught engaging in coitus during a club meeting, the excuse “but I was just pinging her pong” is far from adequate.
10 Ways My New Relationship Is Nothing Like the Ryan Lochte Gas Station Scandal of the 2016 Rio De Janeiro Olympics
I’ve never lied about being robbed at gunpoint to avoid admitting to pissing in some bushes outside of a western Rio de Janeiro gas station.
Cheap Summer Vacations, Blueberry Pancakes, and MLB Courtesy
Scott Scranton explains how to vacay cheaper this summer—without sacrificing fun. Plus, Glen Lentil's blueberry pancakes from the heart.
Other Basketball Movies Being Remade as Less Horny
Above The Rim: No one gets a scholarship to Georgetown, where many hookups can take place, because the grounds have been converted to a WeWork space.
Little League Inspiration, Summer Gift Guide, and Sustainable Living
Get suitable gift ideas for any run-of-the-mill person, and tips for reusing leftovers from Sarah Reelwomin (NOT a raccoon).
I’m Quitting—This Bowling Alley Is Going to Have to Find a New CGI Skeleton to Go On-Screen After a Strike
I became a bowling alley screen animation because damn it, I love this sport and I love being a part of it.