How to Pretend You Had Friends Pre-Pandemic: A Phrasebook
“Hi!” (casual) or “Hello!” (formal): These will give the impression that you are used to greeting people and it does not frighten you.
Tag: Confusion
Yes, Non-Smartphone Scrabble Is Still Available for Purchase
When you need a break from the mind-numbing fixation of staring at your phone, Scrabble® is here to help you.
I Hate Mandela Effect: This Whole Time I Thought “Winnie the Pooh” Was “Weiner the Poop”
I was hesitant about bringing up my favorite books, the "Horny Pottrom" series, but I had to know the truth.
Babe, I Didn’t Forget Valentine’s Day—I’m Just Going All Out for Sweetest Day
Sweetest Day is better and not until October 16th, so I'm actually way early in already talking about it.
Your Therapist Here, Addressing Your Concerns: Yes, I Hate You
When I don’t immediately respond to your texts, it’s not because I’m just busy doing other things, it’s because I definitely hate you.
How to Look Like You Know Where You’re Going When You Clearly Don’t
Think something along the lines of “My oven is on!” or “I have a deadline to meet!” hold up your index finger in the air, and abruptly turn around.
Hey, What Day Is It?
I woke up today thinking it was Thursday, but it turns out it might be Tuesday. I’m not really sure because both of them start with a “T.”
I’m Not the Chosen One You Need or Want
My astrology app once said that I was destined for greatness, but I thought that meant a diet tea sponsorship on Instagram or a successful Etsy shop.
A Request from the 9 Tabs You’ve Had Open Since July
We know you opened us with the best of intentions but let’s be honest, if you haven’t read us by now you never will.
The Stories Behind the Story Behind Dan Fogelberg’s “Same Old Lang Syne”
When I hear this song, I remember how Krakenfuss kept her grocery store open on Christmas Eve. She was the richest person in town and the meanest.
How to Change Your Whole Vibe by Carrying an Umbrella
Umbrella guy controls his own narrative. Whatever secrets lie in wait within his collapsible shield, he’s not telling. His mystique is undeniable.
FAQ: Fact-Checking for New Conspiracy Theorists
Q: How can I tell if someone is trying to deceive me? A: Ever since my yoga teacher introduced me to QAnon I realized the importance of credibility.