I Clap When the Plane Lands
Clapping is the least we can do to show our appreciation that we didn’t end up pancaked against the side of a mountain.
Tag: Travel
I’ve Traveled Back in Time to Be on the Forbes “30 Under 30”
With the last dregs of humanity, I became one of the lucky few to be invited into a reinforced bunker (along with my pal Mike, who is not as grateful).
A Comprehensive List of Places I Don’t Want to Go
- A dairy farm (allergic to cows) - Siberia (too cold, no McDonald’s)
Happy New Year! Don’t Live in a Van
I know you’ve seen the TikTok reels and DIY YouTube videos, but you do not want to live in a van.
We’re Going to Begin Boarding Your Flight in the Following Order
Families traveling with children can begin boarding, at this time. Is anyone here thinking of having children? You, too, are welcome to line up.
A Tourism Brochure for [YOUR HOMETOWN]
Whether you're traveling to us for our illustrious corporate office complex or our fine lack of sidewalks, we guarantee an enjoyable stay.
The Real Reasons We’re Going Back to the Moon
- The Apollo 14 flag got wrinkled and needs ironing.
Terrifying Profiles on Your College’s Alumni Website
John Chris: I am in my tenth year of overseeing the murder division at Clemsaw Capital. I would be happy to help current students in any way I can!
I Really Shouldn’t Have Worn a Suit on This Camping Trip
“We’re not in the boardroom anymore, eh fellas?” I said. But Ross seemed genuinely injured.
Theoretical Physicist Michio Kaku Asked Me to Stop Sending Him These Solutions to the Grandfather Paradox
Anyone who tries to create a paradox gets stopped by theoretical physicist Michio Kaku and his incredible superpowers.
Welcome to Your Hotel’s Meager “Gym”
Wipe down equipment after use with one of the damp napkins placed atop our overflowing garbage bins.
Terms and Conditions Agreement Between a Local and a Fucking Summer Person
The Summer Person is permitted to remark out loud a phrase along the lines of “This town is so quaint” a total of (1) time.