Carrie Pinkard | Points in Case

Comedy writer based in the decrepit basement of the United States: Tampa, Florida.

Comedy Writing

Take a few breaths, now a few more breaths. Are you really wheezing already? That was only the second trip to the U-Haul.

Stakes are high, and friendships will be severed. But as Paul’s prominent bicep tattoo says, “All’s Fair in Love and Pub Trivia.”

He loves late-night, steamy phone calls when I’m home alone. I always tell him it’s such a boomer move but he just loves hearing my voice!

You spent 49 hours listening to our ear-piercing message alert sound…

Bear from "Bear in the Big Blue House" Is a Landlord: He has converted his Big Blue House into nine tiny, poorly ventilated studio apartments.

She has experienced the perfect amount of sexual oppression and shame to properly teach your daughters about their growing bodies.

Very hard to get a hold of. / Rarely available but never disappears forever. / Covered in BBQ sauce.

Mina, it's me Drac! 479 is the new 35! Please message me back. I’m going batshit crazy without you.

I spend most of my time trying to escape the room so I don’t have to listen, but the door is always closed.

Alright, let me check my phone. No response? That’s completely cool. I’ll just play with my dog for a little bit.

We want to make one thing perfectly clear: We will not be recalling our Roombas no matter how violent they get.

I thought long and hard about what kind of birthday message to send you. Then I waited for what seemed like decades to receive your reply.