Teachers | Points in Case

Tag: Teachers

Course Materials/Payment: Double Baconator with large fry OR Pack of cigs (Camel preferred) OR 6-pack of Miller Lite

Are you picturing the powder keg? Think back to the last time you went out to sea and needed to bring a large amount of gunpowder.

Babies' forearm prints all turned into leeches crawling around a fetid pond.

Dr. Ellis is not worrying about grading papers or summoning a hoard of lizard monsters for Gork the Lizard King.

Come on, these kids only have so much grit before they get completely fatigued.

Do not, under any circumstances, throw a bowling ball at Mrs. Heathridge.

- O Captain! My Captain! - Please get off the desk.

Our Tallest 2nd Grader: I mean, have you seen this kid? He can even spell “tyrannosaur.” Anyway, he’ll be teaching AP Bio.

For PE period, Mr. Smith will lead you in a round of mumblety peg, which he informs us has something to do with knife-throwing! Zany!

What do you want me to say? That I'm sorry for sending an email when your mental energy is devoted to teaching during a pandemic? I am.

Uranus: It’s a planet, but you don’t have to mention every last one. Say, “Earth, Jupiter, Saturn, Venus, Neptune, Mercury, Mars, and so on.”

And no matter what you, other teachers, or the PTA may say, this has nothing to do with my film's complete rejection from festivals nationwide.