I have a bug in my mug.

I have electric eels in my high heels.

I have a giraffe in my carafe.

I shouldn’t have bought a zoo.

I have a snake in my milkshake.

I have a koala bear in my underwear.

That Matt Damon documentary made it look easy.

I have a parrot holding a carrot.

I have a puffin eating my muffin.

I shouldn’t have constructed the zoo in my condo.

I have a hen in my den.

I have a hawk in my caulk.

Does IKEA sell an aviary?

I have an asp on my hair clasp.

I have a bobcat on my bathmat.

I think this may have affected the resale value of my condo.

I have an ox destroying my Xbox.

I have a moose on the loose.

I haven’t slept in seventy-nine hours. Do cockatoos usually look this blurry?

I have a kangaroo wearing my shoe, and my socks, and my best suit. He’s using my social security number to apply for a bank loan.

I have an otter listening to the police blotter. She gives a thumbs up to the others.

Am I the zookeeper or the zookept?

I have a crane swinging a bike chain. He smiles at me. The bird has teeth.

I have a beaver holding my meat cleaver. He’s nodding at the walrus, saying “It’s time.”

I have a zoo in my condo.

I am in a zoo in my condo.

I am…I am so itchy…oh.

I have ants in my pants.