8 Robots You’re About to Marry (Because You Say Yes to Everything)
The U15-Humanoid Robot was granted independence by the Government or Earth, and the first thing it decided to do was find a human to marry.
Tag: Robots
The Indifference Rover
6:45 AM – The Indifference Rover has been located in the staff rec room where it was watching television. It has been returned to the rocket.
Fun Time Killers for Park Rangers
Form A Team Of International Criminals To Rob The US Treasury: It’s on your mind now, it’s all you can think about, and you know what? Why not?
Signs Your Therapist Is a Robot
Instead of a medical degree, they display the Three Laws of Robotics and a nude photo of R2D2 on the wall.
You Have to Learn Coding! It’s the Only Way to Survive the Job Market and the Wrath of Our Robot Overlords
It’s the only way to hack job market, make killer money, and convince our Robot Overlords to let you keep your original brain!
Awkward Conversations With Your Self-Driving Uber
You: Uber, why are we taking Broadway? Uber: We are briefly stopping at your ex-girlfriend Karen’s house on the way. You two need to talk…
Concerning the “Automated Boudoir Companion” I Purchased From Your Catalog
I was unable to tell if it was the machine or I who was screaming as I was jostled unpleasantly amid black smoke and splattering whale jelly.
Ways the World Could End and What Happens After
The Sun Explodes: It’s been on fire for a few centuries now, it is only a matter of time until it explodes like a thing of bug spray in a campfire.
Journal Entries Show That Henry Ford Invented the Weekend in Part Because He Loved to Get Wrecked in a Major Way
October 1st, 1926 “Automobiles are fine, but Partybots are the future. I don’t understand why my investors are mad.”
Robotics Team Totally Not Fucking the Robot
“Why does it have breasts?” Uh, women have breasts, okay? i-Rene is obviously female, duh! I mean we named her i-Rene.
Idiot Humans Love When AI Jumbles Up Words
The human appeared to be leaking water from its eyes while reading “Baby this is your back,” “All of our umbrellas are so in love,” & “Lose Your Ya!”
I Read Your Guidelines, But I’m Submitting This Piece That Clearly Isn’t a Fit for Your Publication Because, Well, Just Read It and You’ll See Why
It's basically the best thing since Gravity's Rainbow. Think of it sort of as Infinite Jest but more like Pirates of the Caribbean and with robots.