There’s a woman working out alone in my gym that I want to offer some advice. How should I do it?
Fantastic question! Don’t.
But what if she'll appreciate it because I have great tips?
She won't, and you don't.
What if I’m not a man?
Interesting hypothetical, but yes you are. Don't.
What if I think she’s not lifting enough and needs my encouragement?
She don’t.
What if I think she’s lifting too much and needs my safety advice?
Don't, unless someone is moments from being decapitated on the hack squat machine. And even then, maybe don't.
But what if she WANTS my advice?
Oh, then it might be ok. What question did she ask you?
It wasn't so much a specific question, but her vibe was like–
DON'T.
What if I could help her increase muscle activation on the exercise she’s doing?
What exercise is she doing?
Barbell glute thrusts.
Of course. And trick question. Regardless, don't.
But I really know what I’m talking about. What if I told you I am world-renowned powerlifting coach and eight-time USA Powerlifting National Champion Mike Tuscherer?
Ok. Are you world-renowned powerlifting coach and eight-time USA Powerlifting National Champion Mike Tuscherer?
…No.
Then don’t.
Actually, wait, yes I am.
Still don’t. And no you aren’t.
What if she’d benefit from the wisdom I’ve learned taking my bench from 185 to 315?
No one cares how much you lift. Don't.
Ok. What if she’d benefit from the wisdom I’ve learned taking my bench from 45 to 135?
Not sure if this is better or worse, but no, don't.
But what if I’m trying to be comforting after some CREEP was giving her advice and being all weird?
Relax, take a deep breath, put on your friendliest smile, and don’t.
But what if I’m not a creep, I’m a nice guy?
Ohhh, well why didn’t you say so earlier? In that case, don't.
What if I want to feel smart by explaining things I watched on fitness YouTube two months ago under the guise of being “helpful”?
Don't. No one should ever admit to watching fitness YouTube.
What if she’s lifting more than me and I want to give tips to imply that I am not lifting that much because I do it “correctly”?
Don't. Maybe you wouldn’t have this problem if you focused more on your own workouts?
What if I am physiologically incapable of just being glad that people are exercising and leaving them alone?
Don't. And there is a great exercise for this called Cognitive Behavioral Therapy.
What if I am a personal trainer that she literally hired and pays specifically to teach her how to lift?
Honestly even this is a gray area.